Journal Questions
I didn’t know that made you feel that way.
Share your thoughts & feelings.
In life,
you deal with things,
or things deal with you.
Build communication skills, plan your future, and discover new things about each other.
All human relationships—business, friendship, or romance—are built on trust. This trust is established and maintained through honest, respectful, and open communication, paired with loyalty.
The first two years of marriage are an adjustment period for every married couple.
Unlike cohabiting with a roommate, marriage involves a new set of financial and legal responsibilities, as well as different social and personal expectations. Even couples who lived together before marrying can be surprised by these new challenges during this initial stage of married life.
I have prepared some proactive questions to help you minimize misunderstandings and avoid hurt feelings during the first two years of marriage.
I suggest giving yourselves a wedding gift by sitting down with a notebook and pen to jot down your thoughts and feelings in response to these questions.
Once you have written your responses, please discuss them privately with each other.
Sharing your journal responses with a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist can significantly improve your marriage and life.
While premarital counseling is not obligatory, consider including it in your marriage process.
As part of your wedding package, we are pleased to offer a complimentary thirty-minute counseling session with Dr. James Walton. This is a wedding gift to both of you.
El Doctor Walton habla español con fluidez y puede realizar sus citas en inglés o español
MONEY MATTERS
What are my short and long-term financial goals for us as a couple?
What is our current financial health, i.e., savings and debts?
Do we have retirement plans, pensions, 401 K, or IRAs?
How will we make decisions regarding our household expenses?
Will we create and abide by a budget?
How will we handle payments of our monthly bills and periodic expenses?
How do we handle a significant income disparity between us, if one exists?
What if one of our careers requires us to relocate to another part of the country/world?
Do we each have a primary care physician and health insurance?
Do we each have Advanced Medical Care Directives?
Do we have a Trust/Will?
Consider making an appointment with a fiduciary financial advisor and an attorney to arrange your financial and legal affairs for your life as a couple.
IN-LAWS & FRIENDS
When you marry a person, you marry into their family and adopt their friends. Often, this is a joyous occurrence. However, some new in-laws or adopted “friends” can be irritants or outright hostile.
Do our families support our marriage?
Do we both feel accepted and valued by each other’s family and friends?
How will we handle conflicts with family and friends?
How will important holidays be spent together, e.g., Thanksgiving?
CHILDREN
Proactively consider and discuss the subject of children.
Do we want to have/adopt children, and if so, how many do we want?
What values/beliefs do you wish to impart to your children?
How will you, as individuals and as a couple, discipline children?
BLENDED FAMILIES
Your fiance/fiancee may enter your relationship with children. In contemporary society, there are many blended families. The “blending” process is just that and usually entails many emotional and relational issues.
If your partner already has children, how do you connect with them?
Where will the children reside?
Is a parenting plan in effect if you bring children into your marriage?
What challenges do you anticipate in blending your families?
What values/beliefs do you wish to impart to your children?
How will you, as individuals and as a couple, discipline children?
